{"id":1167,"date":"2019-11-20T16:50:31","date_gmt":"2019-11-20T16:50:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/?p=1167"},"modified":"2025-03-20T17:21:51","modified_gmt":"2025-03-20T21:21:51","slug":"surviving-a-narcissist","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/2019\/11\/20\/surviving-a-narcissist\/","title":{"rendered":"Surviving A Narcissist"},"content":{"rendered":"<style>.wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05, .wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05[data-kb-block=\"kb-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05\"]{display:block;padding-bottom:var(--global-kb-spacing-md, 2rem);text-align:center;font-size:var(--global-kb-font-size-sm, 0.9rem);font-weight:400;font-style:italic;font-family:proxima-nova;}.wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05 mark.kt-highlight, .wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05[data-kb-block=\"kb-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05\"] mark.kt-highlight{font-style:normal;color:#f76a0c;-webkit-box-decoration-break:clone;box-decoration-break:clone;padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;}.wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05 img.kb-inline-image, .wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05[data-kb-block=\"kb-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05\"] img.kb-inline-image{width:150px;vertical-align:baseline;}<\/style>\n<span class=\"kt-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05 wu-subheading wp-block-kadence-advancedheading has-kb-palette-14-color has-text-color\" data-kb-block=\"kb-adv-heading1167_9e1938-05\">L-R, Dr. James Walsh and Dr. Todd Grande<\/span>\n\n\n<style>.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 > .kt-inside-inner-col{padding-right:var(--global-kb-spacing-lg, 3rem);padding-bottom:var(--global-kb-spacing-lg, 3rem);padding-left:var(--global-kb-spacing-lg, 3rem);}.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 > .kt-inside-inner-col,.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 > .kt-inside-inner-col:before{border-top-left-radius:0px;border-top-right-radius:0px;border-bottom-right-radius:0px;border-bottom-left-radius:0px;}.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 > .kt-inside-inner-col{column-gap:var(--global-kb-gap-sm, 1rem);}.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 > .kt-inside-inner-col{flex-direction:column;}.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 > .kt-inside-inner-col > .aligncenter{width:100%;}.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 > .kt-inside-inner-col:before{opacity:0.3;}.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48{position:relative;}@media all and (max-width: 1024px){.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 > .kt-inside-inner-col{flex-direction:column;justify-content:center;}}@media all and (max-width: 991px){.kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 > .kt-inside-inner-col{flex-direction:column;justify-content:center;}}.no-button button {\tdisplay: none !important;\tvisibility: hidden;}<\/style>\n<div class=\"wp-block-kadence-column kadence-column1167_899fbf-48 dynamic-main-col\"><div class=\"kt-inside-inner-col\"><style>.wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_f33905-02, .wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_f33905-02[data-kb-block=\"kb-adv-heading1167_f33905-02\"]{font-size:1.5rem;line-height:30px;font-weight:500;font-style:italic;font-family:proxima-nova;color:#808080;}.wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_f33905-02 mark.kt-highlight, .wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_f33905-02[data-kb-block=\"kb-adv-heading1167_f33905-02\"] mark.kt-highlight{font-style:normal;color:#f76a0c;-webkit-box-decoration-break:clone;box-decoration-break:clone;padding-top:0px;padding-right:0px;padding-bottom:0px;padding-left:0px;}.wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_f33905-02 img.kb-inline-image, .wp-block-kadence-advancedheading.kt-adv-heading1167_f33905-02[data-kb-block=\"kb-adv-heading1167_f33905-02\"] img.kb-inline-image{width:150px;vertical-align:baseline;}<\/style>\n<p class=\"kt-adv-heading1167_f33905-02 wp-block-kadence-advancedheading\" data-kb-block=\"kb-adv-heading1167_f33905-02\">It\u2019s possible to cope with narcissists. There\u2019s a way to reclaim your happiness. Two of WilmU\u2019s College of Social and Behavioral Sciences\u2019 certified counselors and faculty explain how.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>The good news is that the world is full of thoughtful people who value others, give attention rather than seek it, and own their weaknesses. We see our value in their eyes and learn to recognize it in ourselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Yet even the most inspiring people are a little narcissistic. In fact, we all are, and that\u2019s a good thing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Healthy narcissism equals healthy self-esteem, which helps us recover from failure and work toward goals. A healthy narcissist can love because she\u2019s learned to love herself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Pathological narcissists, on the other hand, are toxic. \u201cNarcissists who are pathological have very low self-esteem, so they require excessive amounts of admiration and cause suffering for other human beings,\u201d says Dr. James Walsh, a licensed professional counselor of mental health and assistant professor for the M.S. Clinical Mental Health Counseling program in Wilmington University\u2019s College of Social and Behavioral Sciences. (WilmU\u2019s <a href=\"https:\/\/www.wilmu.edu\/behavioralscience\/mscc.aspx\">M.S. in Clinical Mental Health Counseling<\/a> is the only program in Delaware accredited by the Council for Accreditation of Counseling and Related Educational Programs.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Pathological narcissists, herein referred to as narcissists, \u201care recognized by their need for social dominance, arrogance and sense of entitlement,\u201d says Dr. Todd Grande, also a licensed professional counselor of mental health and an associate professor for the Clinical Mental Health Counseling program. \u201cAt the clinical level, those who exhibit extreme traits are diagnosed often with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD).\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>According to the &#8220;Diagnostic Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders,&#8221; a product of the American Psychological Association, prevalence estimates for narcissistic personality disorder range from 0 to 6.2 percent in community samples. The 2018 U.S. Census reports the U.S. population at more than 327 million. This suggests that millions of people could fall prey to narcissists.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Whether&nbsp; through&nbsp; marriage, friendship or at work, a narcissist will probably blow through each of our lives. They won\u2019t comprehend the destruction they left behind, nor will they recognize the need to apologize for it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cPersonality largely doesn\u2019t change,\u201d says Dr. Grande. \u201cNormally what starts to change is a realization that someone <em>needs<\/em> to change and a narcissist never has that realization. So you\u2019re left with changing yourself. We have to make our own adaptations to survive what is called narcissistic abuse.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Which could be mitigated by reacquainting ourselves with the people we were before the abuse. Drs. Grande and Walsh believe there are ways to lessen narcissists\u2019 control. Victims have to embrace change, and change is hard \u2014 until they decide definitively that everyone, including themselves, deserves happiness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group alignwide wu-blockquote-row is-nowrap is-layout-flex wp-container-core-group-is-layout-ad2f72ca wp-block-group-is-layout-flex\">\n<blockquote class=\"wp-block-quote wu-blockquote-simple is-layout-flow wp-block-quote-is-layout-flow\">\n<p>As Maya Angelou said: \u201cYou may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.\u201d The same is true of narcissists. You can\u2019t avoid them, but you don\u2019t have to be reduced by them either.\u201cI tell my students to write from their hearts, which is just what I did with my book,\u201d she says. \u201cI want to give people hope that they can be crazy in love.\u201d&nbsp;<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-theme-palette-3-color has-text-color has-link-color wp-elements-e72448a8a29f9f179e6d0596e3ce6426\">Suffering<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Ebenezer Scrooge was the ultimate narcissist, says Dr. Walsh. (Scrooge is the protagonist and antagonist in Charles Dickens\u2019s \u201cA Christmas Carol.\u201d) He has the perfect victim: his impoverished and compassionate assistant, Bob Cratchit, who today might be described as an empath, the narcissist\u2019s polar opposite.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cScrooge diminishes and ridicules Cratchit regularly, but Cratchit takes it in stride,\u201d says Dr. Walsh. \u201cHe enjoys the richness of his family life and refuses to bring Scrooge into his happy home.\u201d Cratchit can barely feed his kids yet holds no animosity toward the man who pays him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>This is fiction, of course. Ghosts have reportedly never visited a narcissist and facilitated his transformation into a benevolent person \u2014 overnight. In reality, Scrooge would not have changed. And Cratchit would\u2019ve been thrown to the wolves the moment he stopped idealizing him.<\/p>\n\n\n<style>.kb-image1167_79909c-0a .kb-image-has-overlay:after{opacity:0.3;}<\/style>\n<div class=\"wp-block-kadence-image kb-image1167_79909c-0a\"><figure class=\"alignleft size-medium\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"250\" height=\"167\" src=\"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/GettyImages-1070079130-250x167.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"kb-img wp-image-14978\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/GettyImages-1070079130-250x167.jpg 250w, https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/GettyImages-1070079130-720x480.jpg 720w, https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/GettyImages-1070079130-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/GettyImages-1070079130-1536x1024.jpg 1536w, https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/GettyImages-1070079130-2048x1365.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 250px) 100vw, 250px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>A narcissist \u201cfeels entitled to make all the decisions, even if they\u2019re simply incorrect,\u201d says Dr. Walsh. \u201cThey wield power with complete impunity. They\u2019re so deserving of your admiration and so lacking in empathy that they get into a fantasy world. And in that world, they are never at fault with anything.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Even a decent relationship with a narcissist can erode. \u201cWhen they have someone in their life who\u2019s really admiring of them, they think of them highly,\u201d says Dr. Walsh. \u201cBut the moment that person disagrees with them, she will be&nbsp;proclaimed an idiot or moron, usually in a very public manner, leaving intact the narcissist\u2019s&nbsp;damaged ego.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cNarcissistic Personality Disorder bleeds over to the clinical arena when it\u2019s extreme; when they display a highly exaggerated sense of superiority, grandiosity, fantasies of unlimited power, and the constant need for special treatment,\u201d says Dr. Grande. \u201cTheir relationships tend to fail. They\u2019re vulnerable to the slightest criticism, so if they\u2019re challenged, they become unhinged.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>According to the Mayo Clinic, people with NPD present certain traits: They react with contempt and try to belittle others to make themselves appear superior. They can\u2019t regulate their emotions, so they experience major problems dealing with stress and adapting to change. They become moody when they fall short of perfection.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Narcissists appear confident, but inside they\u2019re extremely insecure, says Dr. Grande. \u201cThey feel shame, vulnerability and humiliation, and try to hide that by monopolizing conversations. With narcissism, we see other related traits. One of them is psychopathy, which is usually thought of as scary or serial killers, but most of the time it isn\u2019t anything like that. Psychopathy can be subclinical, as can narcissism, and both have destructive characteristics.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cWithin psychopathy is superficial charm. That means that narcissists, if they\u2019re psychopathic, which often they would be subclinically, have very good initial presentations. They do well on interviews and with social situations where they greet people, smile and shake hands. What they lack is any depth or sensitivity. They build an efficient shell that mirrors what they see other extroverted people doing.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>They appear charming at first and people are drawn to their charisma \u2014 until their true colors pop. \u201cNarcissists aren\u2019t respected; they\u2019re tolerated,\u201d says Dr. Walsh. \u201cThat doesn\u2019t mean they\u2019re not good at what they do.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>In fact, adds Dr. Grande: \u201cThey\u2019re often intelligent, productive people. They may do things so crucial that they can\u2019t be replaced. They can have high conscientiousness. And being disagreeable can be an asset, depending on their professional roles.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Perhaps most painful to people who become disillusioned by narcissistic spouses, parents, friends, coworkers or managers \u2014 anyone they once admired \u2014 is the realization that their relationships are built on shaky ground. In time, \u201ctheir\u201d narcissists will devalue them in order to feel good about themselves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cThey tend to leave behind a trail of broken relationships,\u201d says Dr. Walsh, which he attributes largely to their lack of compassion. \u201cNarcissists don\u2019t have the emotional experiences most of us have when we feel empathy. If I walked into a room and you were tearful, I would feel something. The empathic behavior comes naturally and internally. Narcissists don\u2019t get that feeling.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading has-theme-palette-3-color has-text-color has-link-color wp-elements-329f88c690043ae791b85a6acd678f06\">Healing<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Again, the stats suggest that millions of people could suffer narcissistic abuse. \u201cBut the number of victims would actually be higher if one were to consider vulnerable narcissists (not captured by the definition of NPD) and subclinical narcissists (not captured anywhere),\u201d says Dr. Grande. \u201cGiven the prevalence of NPD \u2014 and the probability that it\u2019ll only get worse \u2014 victims would be well served by learning to cope with them.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n<style>.kb-image1167_f95d76-f9 .kb-image-has-overlay:after{opacity:0.3;}<\/style>\n<div class=\"wp-block-kadence-image kb-image1167_f95d76-f9\"><figure class=\"alignleft size-medium\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"250\" height=\"167\" src=\"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/GettyImages-941195070-300x200-1-250x167.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"kb-img wp-image-14981\" srcset=\"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/GettyImages-941195070-300x200-1-250x167.jpg 250w, https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/GettyImages-941195070-300x200-1.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 250px) 100vw, 250px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>The first step involves personal space. Drs. Walsh and Grande agree that it\u2019s critical to set boundaries, whether the relationship involves a spouse, friend or work colleague.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>That\u2019s not always possible, but Julie L. Hall, a regular contributor to The Huffington Post and author of \u201cThe Narcissist in Your Life,\u201d offers suggestions: Document your feelings to become more self-aware; give yourself permission to say no; take time for yourself; and don\u2019t become isolated. Seek support from a therapist to release feelings you\u2019ve kept buried. She also notes the importance of being direct, so learn to communicate what you will and won\u2019t do. (Sometimes difficult to do in a professional environment.) Finally, be patient with yourself. Healing takes time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>When you date a narcissist, you can call it quits. \u201cBut when people get married, it gets more complicated,\u201d says Dr. Grande. \u201cCouples believe it\u2019s for the long term. Society demands that they intertwine financially and logistically; a wife may take a husband\u2019s name, children may be involved. It\u2019s a very engrained social construct. Even when a spouse discovers she\u2019s married to a narcissist, leaving is not always a viable option. Narcissism alone actually dissolves very few marriages.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Dr. Walsh adds that couples considering separation or divorce can choose counseling. \u201cIt\u2019s possible for the narcissist in the relationship to become aware of his behavior. The disorder can be treated.\u201d If narcissists can get to a point where they own their weaknesses, and that\u2019s a big \u201cif,\u201d a mental health professional can offer strategies to help manage them. Professionals also can guide them in the realization that they\u2019re not perfect and some things actually <em>are<\/em> their fault. Dr. Walsh says it\u2019s a long and difficult journey \u2014 for both spouses \u2014 but possible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Professional situations get tricky. \u201cIt\u2019s about managing the narcissist, yes, but more often, being managed by the narcissist,\u201d says Dr. Grande. \u201cThe narcissistic personality is driven toward self-aggrandizing efforts and sometimes that can be achieved through work. Because their social skills are so lacking, work is the one place where they can gain rank and status.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Dr. Walsh says that you can manage up, but carefully; you\u2019re dealing with a fragile ego. \u201cA narcissist may feel entitled to call you at 4 a.m., and get an immediate response,\u201d he adds. \u201cShe\u2019s not going to have any sense that she doesn\u2019t deserve to have you do that. If you respond without any pushback, it just reinforces her behavior. You can say, \u2018It\u2019s 4 a.m., and I\u2019ll do this, but I\u2019ll be coming in late.\u2019 You\u2019ll either earn respect or get fired. Making bold moves like this can be empowering, but they may come at<br>a cost.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Victims tend to avoid confrontation. Like bullies, narcissists are better at it. They\u2019ll argue till they win. Plus, they will undermine people once they target their weaknesses.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>According to Dr. Leon F. Seltzer in his article for Psychology Today, \u201cWhen approaching disagreements with a narcissist routinely results in feeling punished, you soon learn that to achieve any peace in the relationship, you\u2019ll be required to keep your frustrations to yourself. And the manner in which most people accomplish this superficial harmony is through accommodating&nbsp;or pacifying&nbsp;them.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Yet pacifying them too long can be psychologically devastating. \u201cThe narcissist may demand more of you than you can actually produce, and then if you fail, she\u2019ll blame you,\u201d says Dr. Grande.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It\u2019s called gaslighting, and it\u2019s one of the most effective strategies narcissists use to gradually manipulate people until they start to question their worth or sanity. Once she drags her victim to his lowest point, she\u2019ll compliment him. It\u2019s a power play; a game that keeps victims off-kilter and narcissists in control. (Gaslighting is also a common technique of abusers, dictators and cult leaders. Its name comes from the 1944 film \u201cGaslight,\u201d about a woman whose husband slowly manipulates her into believing that she\u2019s going insane.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Healing starts when victims ditch the need <em>to be right<\/em>. If the narcissist insists he\u2019s right, even when you know he\u2019s not, let him win, counselors advise. He needs to be right more than you do. The object is to work hard and lose the resentment. In time, your work should speak for itself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>A set of skills called Resource Management Ability can help with job tension, adds Dr. Grande. \u201cSidestep the narcissist, whether she\u2019s a coworker, client or manager, and find other ways to get your job done. Find people who will help make your job more efficient; learn to network; find other methods to do your job, like new software or webinars \u2014 if possible, at your own expense. Build alliances with non-narcissists who value your strengths. Talk to someone you trust. Sometimes it\u2019s just a matter of being heard.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cPeople who choose to stay in toxic relationships are not weak,\u201d says Dr. Walsh. \u201cThey seek a higher purpose.\u201d Maybe their love for their children cancels out divorce, or the narcissist-spouse is the major breadwinner. Sometimes people choose to serve an organization they honor and take the good with the bad.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cWhen you do stay in the relationship,\u201d says Dr. Walsh, \u201ckeep in mind that the abuse is not about you. Having a narcissist work for you can be bad for your job longevity.&nbsp;Watch out from below!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Living<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>Seek your source of self-knowledge and self-esteem from people who love you,\u201d says Dr. Walsh. \u201cIntrospection is fine, but most of us come to know ourselves when we see how others perceive us. Live a healthy lifestyle \u2014 actually, live a good life.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Then, once you\u2019ve taken back your self-respect, you can do something outrageous: Have compassion. \u201cNarcissists have often suffered severe mental or physical abuse,\u201d says Dr. Grande. \u201cIt can be very sad to learn how a toxic personality developed.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>To paraphrase a report from Dr. Darryl Cross, a clinical and organizational psychologist at the Institute for Leadership Coaching in Australia, vulnerable types of narcissists had parents who lacked warmth and were highly critical and faultfinding. Narcissistic children develop an endearing sense of self to counteract feelings of inadequacy. Theirs is a lifelong journey to seek the praise and adulation they never got.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u201cIt\u2019s not what\u2019s wrong with this person, it\u2019s what <em>happened<\/em> to this person,\u201d says Dr. Walsh. \u201cIf you look at someone\u2019s case history, you can see that he or she never experienced unconditional love. That\u2019s not to dismiss the agony narcissists cause; it\u2019s just to say that their behavior is the manifestation of their life experiences.\u201d Everyone gets disillusioned at some point; it\u2019s how we handle it that matters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>It starts with forgiveness. \u201cIf you don\u2019t practice forgiveness, you might be the one who pays most dearly,\u201d according to researchers from the Mayo Clinic. \u201cBy embracing forgiveness, you can also embrace peace, hope, gratitude and joy. Consider how forgiveness can lead you down the path of physical, emotional and spiritual well-being.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Cratchit had it right all along \u2014 or more accurately, Charles Dickens did. Arguably the greatest novelist of the Victorian era, Dickens was born in poverty. He had no formal education and worked in a factory. Critics say that his empathy for the poor likely inspired many of his characters.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>So the lesson comes from his humble Cratchit: Leave the toxicity behind. No one has power over us unless we give it to them. The world is full of people who choose to honor others, not belittle them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Most of all, find peace in a place you love, with the people you love.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>That\u2019s happiness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator has-alpha-channel-opacity\"\/>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Narcissistic Personality Inventory<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p>The following quiz* was designed to quickly assess narcissistic traits and is not to be used as a substitute for clinical assessment. For a comprehensive and valid assessment, please see a licensed professional mental health counselor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>This quiz is for your eyes only, so be honest.<\/strong> It may help you recognize traits that affect others negatively.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>For each of the following items, indicate whether the statement is mostly true or mostly false.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n<style>.kb-form input.kadence-blocks-field.verify{opacity:0.0;position:absolute;top:0.0;left:0.0;width:0.0;height:0.0;z-index:-1;}<\/style>\n<div class=\"wp-block-kadence-form kadence-form-1167_2abc5b-75 kb-form-wrap no-button\"><form class=\"kb-form\" action=\"\" method=\"post\"><div class=\"kadence-blocks-form-field kb-field-desk-width-100 kb-input-size-standard\"><div data-type=\"checkbox\" data-label=\"\" id=\"kb_field_1167_2abc5b-75_0\" class=\"kb-field kb-checkbox-style-field kb-checkbox-field kb-field-0 kb-radio-style-normal\"><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-0\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_0\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"Others have acknowledged that I am special or great\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_0\">Others have acknowledged that I am special or great<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-1\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_1\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"I can talk my way out of problems\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_1\">I can talk my way out of problems<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-2\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_2\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"Getting respect from others is crucial\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_2\">Getting respect from others is crucial<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-3\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_3\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"I will be famous someday\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_3\">I will be famous someday<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-4\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_4\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"I enjoy being the center of attention\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_4\">I enjoy being the center of attention<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-5\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_5\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"I am well-suited to be a leader\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_5\">I am well-suited to be a leader<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-6\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_6\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"Others are jealous of my talent\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_6\">Others are jealous of my talent<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-7\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_7\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"Others can learn alot from me\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_7\">Others can learn alot from me<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-8\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_8\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"I deserve the best of everything\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_8\">I deserve the best of everything<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-9\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_9\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"When I enter a room, I take charge right away\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_9\">When I enter a room, I take charge right away<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-10\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_10\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"Modesty is for underachievers\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_10\">Modesty is for underachievers<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-11\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_11\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"If I am not in charge, problems are sure to arise\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_11\">If I am not in charge, problems are sure to arise<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-12\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_12\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"People who criticize me are simply jealous\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_12\">People who criticize me are simply jealous<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-13\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_13\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"I dream of being powerful and successful\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_13\">I dream of being powerful and successful<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-14\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_14\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\" I get angry at those who don\u2019t recognize my abilities\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_14\"> I get angry at those who don\u2019t recognize my abilities<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-15\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_15\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\" I hang around with successful people\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_15\"> I hang around with successful people<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-16\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_16\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"I am confident that I can accomplish anything\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_16\">I am confident that I can accomplish anything<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-17\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_17\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"My leadership abillities inspire people\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_17\">My leadership abillities inspire people<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-18\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_18\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"It bothers me when ordinary people believe they are my equals\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_18\">It bothers me when ordinary people believe they are my equals<\/label><\/div><div data-type=\"checkbox\" class=\"kb-checkbox-item kb-checkbox-item-19\"><input type=\"checkbox\" name=\"kb_field_0[]\" id=\"kb_field_0_19\" class=\"kb-sub-field kb-checkbox-style\" value=\"When I am telling a story, everyone pays attention\"\/><label for=\"kb_field_0_19\">When I am telling a story, everyone pays attention<\/label><\/div><\/div><\/div><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"_kb_form_id\" value=\"1167_2abc5b-75\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"_kb_form_post_id\" value=\"1167\"\/><input type=\"hidden\" name=\"action\" value=\"kb_process_ajax_submit\"\/><label class=\"kadence-verify-label\">Email<input class=\"kadence-blocks-field verify\" type=\"text\" name=\"_kb_verify_email\" autocomplete=\"new-password\" aria-hidden=\"true\" placeholder=\"Email\" tabindex=\"-1\" data-1p-ignore=\"true\" data-lpignore=\"true\" \/><\/label><div class=\"kadence-blocks-form-field kb-submit-field kb-field-desk-width-100\"><button class=\"kb-forms-submit button kb-button-size-standard kb-button-width-auto\">Submit<\/button><\/div><\/form><\/div>\n<noscript><div class=\"kadence-blocks-form-message kadence-blocks-form-warning\">Please enable JavaScript in your browser to submit the form<\/div><style>.kadence-form-1167_2abc5b-75 .kadence-blocks-form-field.kb-submit-field { display: none; }<\/style><\/noscript>\n\n\n<p><strong>Add 1 point for each <em>mostly true<\/em> response.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>0 \u2013 2: Low narcissism<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>3 \u2013 5: Average narcissism<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><strong>&gt; 6: High narcissism<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p><em>*The NPI is a self-report scale of narcissism rather than narcissistic personality disorder (Foster &amp; Campbell, 2007).<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>L-R, Dr. James Walsh and Dr. Todd Grande It\u2019s possible to cope with narcissists. There\u2019s a way to reclaim your happiness. Two of WilmU\u2019s College&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":1168,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_kad_blocks_custom_css":"","_kad_blocks_head_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_body_custom_js":"","_kad_blocks_footer_custom_js":"","_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[135],"tags":[647],"class_list":["post-1167","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-magazine","tag-magazine-fall-2019"],"acf":[],"taxonomy_info":{"category":[{"value":135,"label":"MAGAZINE"}],"post_tag":[{"value":647,"label":"Magazine Fall 2019"}]},"featured_image_src_large":["https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/Walsh-and-Grande-wilmu-1024x683-1-720x480.jpg",720,480,true],"author_info":{"display_name":"Rebecca Slinger","author_link":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/author\/rebecca\/"},"comment_info":0,"category_info":[{"term_id":135,"name":"MAGAZINE","slug":"magazine","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":692,"taxonomy":"category","description":"","parent":0,"count":431,"filter":"raw","cat_ID":135,"category_count":431,"category_description":"","cat_name":"MAGAZINE","category_nicename":"magazine","category_parent":0}],"tag_info":[{"term_id":647,"name":"Magazine Fall 2019","slug":"magazine-fall-2019","term_group":0,"term_taxonomy_id":1204,"taxonomy":"post_tag","description":"","parent":0,"count":18,"filter":"raw"}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1167","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1167"}],"version-history":[{"count":9,"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1167\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":17330,"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1167\/revisions\/17330"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1168"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1167"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1167"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.wilmu.edu\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1167"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}